
Custom Letter “B” Design by Darold Pinnock; Picture created by RJ Wagg

EVERYTHING WAS BEAUTIFUL
AND EVERYTHING HURTI was drunk on St. Ides
and mildly stoned
from cheap marijuana.Danielle was passed out on the floor
with Andrew. Lana was vomiting
in the bathroom. And Lauren,
the anorexic rich girl
I barely knew –– the one withname-brand clothes
and a Porsche parked outside ––was kneeling next to me
on my bed where I was lying.Lauren kept on poking my shoulder
and asking me what happened
to my last girlfriend ––
asking me how “someone so nice
could ever get dumped
out of the blue like I did.”“It’s a mystery” was all I could say.
She leaned in closer.
“You’re very
underappreciated,” she said.I motioned to her necklace, which was
made of gold-and-silver dandelions
and hung down by her tiny breasts.“Like a…dandelion,” I said,
frowning at my own cheesy comment.“You need someone
who really adores you,” she said.“Yeah, maybe.”
She leaned in closer.
I looked at her thousand-dollar earrings,
her no-blemish skin, her toothpaste-ad teeth.I looked at the gold
of her dandelion necklace.I tried to dissociate by looking
around my room at the washed-out paint
on my walls, the holes in my jeans,
he hand-me-down furniture,
the nicotine-stained rug,
the dollar-store notebooks.Self-consciousness welled up
in my brain like an aneurysm.“Do you miss your ex?” asked Lana.
Her lips were about 2 inches from mine.
She placed her hand
on my inner thigh,
but my penis was limp ––
a goldfish playing dead.“Don’t,” I said.
“Come on. It’ll be fun.”
My eyes grew puffy with shame.
My lips withered like salted slugs
or flower petals. Vomit bubbled
at the back of my throat
like high-grade champagne
I’d never be able to afford.“Don’t,” I said again.
She reached for my belt.
She tried to kiss me,
but her dandelion necklace
got in the way, blocking her.She backed up and started fumbling
with the back of the necklace.
Suddenly, the necklace snapped.“Damn,” she said. “Oh, well. I don’t
think it’s real gold anyway.”As she tossed it into the wastebasket,
I started to weep.